Choosing "the better part..."

It was late, Pope Gregory the Great tells us. Benedict and his twin sister, Scholastica, had spent the day together. It was their one day - an annual visit at a meeting place between their respective monasteries. Benedict took note of the hour and prepared to leave. Scholastica asked him to stay. She wanted more time with her brother - she wanted to talk about the goodness of GOD all through the night. Benedict didn't get it. He didn't understand - couldn't place her need above The Rule. He made the choice he thought was best for both of them. It was time to say goodbye. Benedict's "no" meant trying a new strategy. Scholastica began to weep and lay her head on the table to pray. Suddenly, the skies opened up and a thunderstorm erupted overhead. Benedict looked at his sister and said, "Woman, what have you done?" We are told that GOD said "yes" to her prayer because her love was greater. Benedict remained with his sister that night and shortly after he returned home, word came of Scholastica's death.

I love this story. Most Benedictine women do. It is read every year on this day - the Feast of Saint Scholastica. The gospel proclaimed for this feast is the story of Martha and Mary - two very different sisters. Martha's complaint against Mary is well known to us. She wanted help in the kitchen. The Lord said to her in reply, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and worried about many things. There is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part and it will not be taken from her."

Saint Benedict wasn't "wrong." Martha wasn't just whining. But Scholastica and Mary made different choices - better choices. And those choices defined their searching. I've made some poor choices in my search for GOD. I am learning that it's never too late to make better choices - to set my heart on the higher things, to choose the Love that will set me free. It's the work of my lifetime. When I die I hope some of my better choices will shine and move GOD's heart - like Scholastica's tears. That hope - this desire - gives me joy today.

Happy feast...and love to you all,

- Sister Vicki

Worse than frogs, hail or locusts...

WARNING: The following blog contains factual information with an "ick"-factor of 7.5 or 8 on a scale of 1-10.

It happened Friday morning. It was 6 AM and we had late-sleep because of the blizzard. I was the only one up. I decided to do some research. It had been five days since I left Amherst. I noticed some spider bites on my hands and face. I thought perhaps a little one had spun his way into my bed. I didn't know anything about spider bites, so I went on-line and looked up insect bites. By 6:30 I was in an absolute panic. The pattern of the bites indicated a reality my mind could not quite grasp. Three little puncture wounds in a straight line, within one week of a motel stay means just one thing - BED BUGS. Yup. I can barely write the words without itching. I ran to my room and stripped the bed linens right down to the mattress and box spring. I put everything though the hot water cycle before the others sisters woke. Before we gathered for Morning Prayer, I had to tell them that we had bed bugs. They were just wonderful. We called the exterminator straight away and they came within hours. The early diagnosis meant that my bedroom was the only "crime scene." And, as the only "victim", I had to remove every item of clothing from my closet and dresser and run them through the hot water cycle as well. Sister Connie helped me. It took two days! The room, mattress, box spring and chair were treated and steamed. The room has been closed off until the SECOND bug treatment next Monday. Until then, I am sleeping in a small bedroom on the second floor. The bites on my arms, hands, face and neck, (50 at last count) have begun to heal. The itching has gone way down and they are much less visible. I spend two nights in a very clean, comfortable motel and became an "all-you-can-eat" buffet for a hungry mob of blood-sucking bugs. (I know GOD created these creatures for a purpose, but right now I am out of mercy and forgiveness."

I spoke with the manager of the motel chain. She went up to room #218, turned over the mattress and discovered an infestation. It will take them three months to complete the treatment. I was impressed with her honesty, her willingness to apologize and her desire to keep this from happening to another guest.

I am, now, an expert on bed bugs. The exterminator was quite impressed with what I learned in 30 minutes on the Internet. First, bed bugs have nothing to do with a place being clean or dirty. They have resurfaced the US in the last three years because of international travel. The come in luggage from countries where they are not controlled. They can hop a ride on clothing, too. When they bite you, you normally won't feel it. You'll sleep right through the attack and notice tiny punctures that will grow to be nickel-sized welts. Most bed bugs don't carry disease., though there are exceptions. They are basically vampires. It's your warmth and your blood they seek. They conceal themselves in the daylight - usually in the box spring or in the crevices of the mattress. They are smart bugs. They learn your sleep pattern quickly. And after a hearty meal at your expense, they have babies and rest for a few days. If you think you've been attacked by bed bugs, CALL A PROFESSIONAL ASAP. Don't try to by a chemical treatment from a grocery store. These suckers (pun intended) are smart, small and fertile! Fortunately, we made the connection early - even before all of the bites became visible.

Now, if you made through this blog, give yourself a pat on the back. I wasn't going to tell anyone but my prioress. Then, after a few days of Cortisone cream and crying periodically, I decided that telling this tale might help someone else. Here is the bottom line. You cannot necessarily see these bugs when you check in. If you stay in hotels/motels frequently, it doesn't matter how upscale the chain. A room can be totally clean and even luxurious, an have an infestation. When you have slept in a motel, the minute you get home, empty the suitcase and your clothing right into the washer and turn it on "hot." Wash out your suitcase with Lysol or VERY hot water. Then, if you've inadvertently brought home "company," they will meet their Maker somewhere close to the spin cycle. May you never have to go through what we've been through this weekend. I pray for those who live in countries where these creatures have free reign and for those who cannot afford the necessary treatment.

Blessings and love to you all...

- Sister Vicki

Presentation of the LORD...

In Disney's "Lion King," there is a moment of collective joy that reminds me of today's feast. The holy one holds the King's son high above the people. They acclaim him as royal prince, heir to the throne. It is good liturgy for the people - a moment for thanksgiving and awe.

Today the Church celebrates the Presentation of the Lord. The baby JESUS is brought to the Temple forty days after his birth. His Mother must be ritually cleansed of the blood of his birth and he must be consecrated to the GOD of Israel. It is an intimate moment, as opposed to the public acclaim given young "Simba." We are invited in by the gospel writer who wants this moment of great joy to change us. There are at least two witnesses - Simeon and Anna. These two holy ones have lived each day of their lives anticipating this day. So great is their faith in GOD that the promise would be fulfilled. When Simeon takes the child in his arms, he looks to heaven and declares, "Lord, let your servant now die in peace for I have seen your salvation!"

Have you seen GOD's salvation? Once, twice? I've seen it so many times in my own life. Today, I thank you, GOD, for showing me the depth of you love and mercy in Christ the Lord.

Blessings and love to you all...

- Sister Vicki

On the road...

Friends,

I am driving to Massachusetts for my aunt's funeral. Look for a blog on Tuesday next. Please pray me home safe.
Blessings and love to you all...

- Sister Vicki

Conversion of Saint Paul...

Have you ever been knocked off your horse? Saul of Tarsus cannot be alone in the rude awakening to truth. Blinded by the Light that saw into his soul, he had to rely on those around him to lead him to wisdom. Resting in the company of Ananias, Saul, now, Paul, needed time to take in the reality of his sin. I imagine he didn’t sleep for nights after seeing his persecution of the Christians for what it was – wrong. Even as the waters of baptism cleansed him of his sin, I imagine Paul carried the weight of his failure for quite some time – until he could see nothing but the Love that had saved him. There are moments in every life when we get knocked off our “horse.” And, they are gift. If we can accept our failure – own it – we can allow GOD’s grace to do its thing. If we are ready to give up the illusion, struggle in the dust of our brokenness and reach out to those wiser in the spiritual journey, we can begin the work of becoming whole again. Like Saint Paul we find that life is better in the Light. Like Saint Paul we begin again. We start out on a new journey illumined by Love.

Blessings and love to you all...

- Sister Vicki

Where have all the hermits gone?

Today the Church celebrates Saint Antony of Egypt – the “first” desert-dweller. Though many were ahead of him in seeking a solitary way of life, Antony pushed the literal boundaries of what it meant to go apart. While his contemporaries isolated themselves on the margins of civilization, Antony went out – way out – into the desolate reaches. Antony went beyond what was “safe” to truly seek GOD in solitude and silence. Out near the tombs where the dead were laid to rest, Antony began his pursuit of holiness – and news of his success turned a reform movement into a way of life.

Where have all the hermits gone? Certainly, a rhetorical question but beneath it lies a real concern. I suspect there are hermits among us in the monastery – women who might feel the tug of solitude on their hearts yet remain in community because the days of the hermit have passed. But have they? The Camaldolese and Carthusians certainly give witness to the opposite. In Europe these marginal monastic communities continue to support the solitary search for GOD. There are a few foundations here in America, but by and large, most monastics find themselves living the cenobitic life – in community, under a rule and a prioress. Saint Benedict believed that the common life was a necessary preparation for the hermit. Only after many years in community would a monastic be granted permission to live apart.

Do I feel called to be a hermit? No way. Anyone who really knows me could assure the truth of that emphatic denial. But, I do suspect that there are hermit-hearts within most monasteries. I know of a community in MN that granted a sister permission to live as a hermit. Sister Jeremy Hall, OSB, lived in a trailer deep in the forest for twenty years. Like Antony she was not afforded total solitude. People came to see her, to seek her wisdom and receive a good word. Perhaps, Sister Jeremy’s story will give courage to those who feel ready for the spiritual work of solitude. Where have all the hermits gone? They are closer than we think.

Blessings and love to you all...

- Sister Vicki

Hearing things...

I love the story in today’s First Reading. The prophet, Eli, is awakened by young Samuel. The boy has heard his name called not once or twice, but three times. It isn’t until the third disruption of his sleep that Eli realizes what’s happening. The child is hearing his name, but is it the Holy One of Israel who is calling to him. Eli instructs the boy to return to bed. He tells Samuel that if he hears his name again, he should say, “Speak, Lord, your servant is listening.”

We all struggle to hear the voice of GOD. Sometimes, we can’t tune in because there are so many other “voices” competing for our attention. Sometimes, we hear the voice but can’t quite be sure to whom it belongs. We question ourselves, feeling unworthy of GOD’s time and attention. That’s when a spiritual companion can be so helpful. When we can accept that we’ve heard the voice of GOD, we accept that GOD dwells within us – speaks from the depths of the human heart. If we are made in the image and likeness of GOD, as the writers of Genesis assert, then some part of us “knows” some part of GOD. There is a bond between Creator and creature that has been ultimately sanctified in the Incarnation - in the Word becoming flesh.

We hear lots of “voices.” What keeps us from hearing the voice of GOD call us by name? What holds us back from praying as Samuel did? From asking GOD to “speak?” My limited experience tells me that if we ask, we will receive. We need only to trust that we are so loved.